i hate spending time alone, it makes me think. i think way too much and it scares me. the paranoia consumes me, and i always wonder what if? sometimes i just need to escape. can you fool yourself into loving somebody? everything is a blur, and you just don't know who to trust. i'm too weak, i could never stand up for what i believe in. i express it internally, i think about it and i picture myself standing up to that somebody, speaking my heart out, telling them how i really feel. but no, i could never. have you ever felt that way? i live in a bubble.
joy hester suffered immensely, her struggles with albert tucker, sweeney, her illness and finally her love for gray smith challenged her in many ways. she however, expressed herself through her art and this can be seen in her 'Love' series. these paintings portray the love joy felt in what she thought were the final years of her life with smith. the merging of the figures, rough brush strokes, fine thick lines and dark colours resonate the pain and love these two souls shared. her work has been a huge (personal) influence on me, her ability to depict emotion truly is remarkable. i hope you too will be inspired.
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